Leo Tolstoy said, "Everyone thinks of changing the world. No one thinks of changing himself." We can choose to disrupt this.
All we have to do is GO FIRST.
Every time we want someone or something to change, we set the precedent by altering the way we treat that person or approach that situation.
Change begins at home.
What a joy visiting Hawaii's famous Talk Story Bookstore, meeting owners Ed and Cynthia Justus and hearing their surprising secrets to building a successful life and business in an out-of-the-way location. Here are a few take-aways from my interview with them. The #1 Prerequisite for a Profitable Retail Business is NOT Location, Location, Location - It’s Clarity, Clarity, Clarity
Their bookstore is on the least-visited major island and in a town of less than 3000 people. Yet they have been one of Hawaii’s Top 50 Fastest-Growing businesses for the past five years. TripAdvisor says they’re THE #1 visitor destination on Kauai.
How can this be? In one word …CLARITY. Clarity is the new location. Clarity about who they are. What they want. What they don’t want. And they stay true to those priorities. Which means gently and firmly enforcing their rules.
For example, you’ve heard “There’s no crying in baseball?” Well, there are no thongs in bookstores. At least not in THEIR bookstore. The twenty-something who walked in wearing her version of an itsy-bitsy, teeny-weenie yellow polka-dot bikini was asked to honor their posted sign, “No shoes, no shirt, no shorts, no service.”
The woman who told them she was going to leave her kids in the store while she went shopping across the street? Nope. “This is a bookstore, not a babysitting service.”
PAVE THE PATHS
Ed and Cynthia didn’t have a background in the book biz and didn’t plan on buying a bookstore. They visited Kauai on their honeymoon and liked it so much, they decided to take a leap of faith and stay. How did they make money from the first day they put their sign up, when they had no experience in the industry?
Ed says, “Amazon’s website taught us everything we needed to know about book-selling. Instead of us trying to figure out which books to stock and what to charge, we simply followed the favorites. Why re-create the wheel? Their site told us the most popular books in each genre and the going price for gently-used books.”
I said, “That’s brilliant. There’s an urban legend called ‘Pave the Paths’ which recommends that instead of prematurely installing sidewalks at public places (e.g., colleges and county buildings), it's smarter to wait and find out where people naturally walk and then put the sidewalks there.
That’s what you did. Instead of stocking what you hoped might sell, you 'booked the beloveds' and bought proven ever-greens that have a track record of always being in demand."
Don’t follow The Rules; Follow Your Values
For example, the “rules” say a brick and mortar store has to have a cash register, right? The problem is, cash registers lock you into one location, often in a front corner of your store. What if you have a customer in back who can’t find what they want? If there’s no one around to answer their question, they often leave and don't come back.
Ed and Cyndi don’t have a cash register; they have cash belts. Wearing a cash belt around their waist gives them freedom to wander the store and connect with their customers. While I was there, they greeted every single person who walked in the store. One was always out on the floor, asking people if they were looking for something in particular and then pointing out recommended authors in their preferred genre.
The trend of many bookstores is to offer coffee to attract customers. Well, they tried that and you know what they learned? Coffee sells coffee. Books sell books.
Another “rule” of retail businesses is you need to diversity if you want to grow. So, they added an art gallery with works from local artists. A restaurant. Book clubs. Internet service. Chairs so people could sit.
Guess what they discovered? Those extra services took lots of extra time and effort, created a lot of problems they didn't want or need ... and didn’t boost profits. In fact, Cyndi said, “We found that for every chair we took away, we added an extra $1000 of income. People who sit and read books for free for hours often walk out without buying any books."
The rules say a retail business needs an inventory system. Ed said, “Why? We mostly stock one copy of each book. Why spend a lot of time logging in and tracking single sales? Plus, we handle every purchase so we know what’s selling and what’s not.”
The Secret to Loving Your Life and Work? Stop Watering Dead Plants
As we talked, it was clear to me that one of the reasons they’ve been so successful is they QUIT doing things that didn’t work; that didn’t make money; and that didn’t bring them joy. This frees up time and money for business activities that contribute to their quality of life instead of compromise it.
They quit the belief that bigger is better. They've built and sustained a successful business because they've honored their belief, "If we don't love it; we don't do it. If it doesn't add personal and professional value, we drop it."
Chip Away Everything That is NOT David
I told them, “There’s a (perhaps apocryphal) story about Michelangelo who said, when asked how he creating his masterpiece sculpture, ‘It’s easy. I just chipped away everything that wasn’t David.’"
I smiled and said, "You have ‘David’d your business and life. You have chipped away everything that isn’t congruent with your values and vision. As a result, the light is on in your eyes and you’re successful for all the right reasons.”
So, what surprising lessons did I take away from my time with Ed and Cyndi?
* CLARIFY your values, vision, priorities and policies and STAY TRUE to them.
* Quit watering dead plants and DAVID your life and business.
* Gently and firmly ENFORCE RULES to protect what’s important to you.
When we do the above, we build a successful life, business and career where the light is on in our eyes - and things just keep getting better and better – for all the right reasons.
- - -
Sam Horn, Intrigue Expert, is on a mission to help people create quality projects that add value for all involved. Her work - including her TEDx talk - and books POP!, IDEApreneur, Tongue Fu! and Got Your Attention? have been featured in NY Times, Forbes, Fast Company and presented to NASA, National Geographic, Capital One, YPO. Want Sam to share her inspiring insights on how to create a successful life and career at your next convention? Contact Cheri@IntrigueAgency.com
A couple years ago this week I spoke for the Women in Consumer Technology conference in NYC and Cathie Black, former President of Hearst Magazines was the other keynoter. When asked her most important lesson-learned about work she said, "You can love your job but it won't love you back."
This came to mind because several people have said something to me recently about their job that caused me to think, "WHY do we do this to ourselves?"
One was flying from our afternoon meeting in one city to another city, had two presentations the next day, one at 8 am and she hadn't begun crafting her power point presentation which meant she was going to have to do it that night when she arrived on the East Coast after 10 pm or the next morning at 5 am.
One spoke about how "insanely busy" she was and that it was going to get worse before it got better because September was going to be a "brutal month."
The other had gotten sick six times in four months (she said, "How is that possible?!) and realized it was a wake-up call as to how toxic her work had become.
So, the question is, "Do you love your job?" At what cost?
Can you love your career AND maintain your quality of life?
How will you love your job AND make time for other priorities you love that love you back - like your friends, your family, your health and your __________ fill in the blank?
I was looking for an evocative quote on the topic of change for one of the chapters in my upcoming book SOMEDAY Is Not a Day in the Week. I found it in this, "I didn't change. I just woke up." (BTW, it's attributed to that ubiquitous philosopher - Anonymous.)
That's what I did on my Year by the Water. I woke up.
I woke up to the fact that:
* the clock is ticking. Not in a morbid way, in a motivating way.
* working, working, working is a prescription for regrets.
* change is not hard. A life we love is often one small change away.
* fun is not a four-letter word.
* we'll never be lonely - as long as we pay attention.
* connection is the North Star and Holy Grail of my life.
* I'd been living neck-up for years - and it was time to come to my senses.
* magic unfolds when we leave room for whims.
* it's time to stop ordering pasta we don't want.
* many of us are driving into hurricanes - because we said we would.
* courage is just trusting we can figure things out.
* Paulo Coelho is right, "One day we're going to wake up and there won't be any time left to do the things we've always wanted to do."
We'll never regret doing more of what puts the light on in our eyes - we'll only regret not doing it sooner.
David Viscott said, "To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides." So true.
One of the most important lessons-learned from my Year by the Water is that it is NOT always better to GIVE than RECEIVE.
It is better to give AND receive.
So many of us are so busy doing and giving to others, we don't allow them to give to us.
There is a grace in giving and a grace in receiving.
Connection is a two-way street.
Are you enjoying and being blessed by BOTH sides of the sun?
When I present SerenDestiny programs, people often ask, "Isn't it selfish to do what you really want?" I tell them, "it is if you exclude everyone else's needs and priorities.
But many of us are doing the opposite of that.
We're honoring everyone else's needs and priorities and ignoring our own."
As Rumi said, "Don't you know yet? Is is YOUR light that lights the world.
This is probably one of the most important lessons-learned from my Year by the Water ... It is not selfish to put ourselves in our own story, it's smart.
It is not an indulgence to do what puts the light on in your eyes and fills you with joy - it is an example that inspires others to do the same.
In fact, here's how I learned that lesson.
Hope it inspires you to shine your light on and in the world.
Dan Millman and his book "Path of the Peaceful Warrior" was one of our favorite author-speakers at the Maui Writers Conference. His insight, "There is no such thing as an ordinary day" is as true today as it was 15 years ago.
It reminds me of the powerful line from Thornton Wilder's play "Our Town."
Emily, the lead character, has passed but gets to return home one last time. She watches her mother wash the dishes in the kitchen and realizes she never appreciated the little things - a normal day - while she had the chance.
She asks poignantly, "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it?"
So often we don't. We get swept up in busyness, rushing here, there and everywhere.
However, we are here now. It is not too late.
Look around right now and imprint this day. Really see your surroundings as if for the first or last time.
Drink in the sheer miracle of being alive - of being able to breathe, feel, hear, taste, touch, love, experience.
A moment of grace and deeply felt gratitude is a moment's notice away.
Love this quote by Zig Ziglar, "Are you putting aside what you want MOST for what you want NOW?" The good news? Sometime there's a sublime convergence and what we want MOST and what we want NOW are the same thing.
Like today. I got some good news about my upcoming book - Chase Meaning, Not Clicks - so I wanted to celebrate.
Headed out to explore a new town and discovered a used bookstore, a fabulous library with a "Read to Rover" program in process, and THE best restaurant I've discovered in Boulder- the EMPIRE. What a perfect day.
Here's the question. What do you want MOST? What do you want NOW? Are they the same? Different?
Could you converge them for a morning, afternoon or weekend so you get to experience the sublime combination of a day where all is right with your world and you are SHINING with happiness and abundance?
When my sons headed off to college, (Yay Virginia Tech), we had 'dah talk." You know the one I'm talking about; where you try to distill everything you've learned into a couple pieces of advice?
One of the "What I know for sure's" I shared with Tom and Andrew was, "If you're ever frustrated sad, confused or in need of a pick-me-up, get out in Mother Nature.
She will fill you with perspective and remind you of what's right in the world."
I was in an exploratory mood yesterday so Googled "park near me?" Minutes later, she directed me to this incredibly inspiring Twin Lakes walking trail. Isn't it glorious?
William Shakespeare was right.
The earth does have music for those who listen and see and appreciate her abundance.
I am in harmony every single time I'm fortunate enough to be in her presence. How about you?
A few years ago - before I went on my Year by the Water - I was neglecting my health, some of my loved ones, and a calling to explore new territory (literally and figuratively) and write more. It feels wonderful to be back in alignment again, focusing on what matters most.
How about you?
Are you neglecting someone or something?
Reach out to the person today. Take time today to take care of that priority that's not been getting the time or attention it deserves.
The key to creating the quality of life you want is no secret. It's simply a matter of focusing on what matters.
Thanks Simon and Garfunkel for this eloquent reminder to SLOW DOWN and make the morning (This moment? This day? This weekend?) last. What's the big hurry? The faster we go, the more we miss.
Stop right now. Look around. Really SEE someone or something as if for the first or last time.
Take a big deep breath. Imprint this moment. Send up thanks for all that's right with your world.
Gratitude is a moment's notice away.
The contentment we seek is on the other side of slowing down.
I laughed out loud at the irony of reading this quote online - "Being a good writer is 20% hard work and 80% not getting distracted by the Internet" - while I was supposed to be working on my book. Thanks for calling me out, Internet.
These days, the key to being a good ANYTHING is 20% paying attention to what really matters and working towards it - and 80% not getting distracted by the Internet.
That includes being a good parent, being a good boss, being a good entrepreneur, being a good person, and yes being a good artist.
It's important to ask ourselves, "Will this matter in the long run? What will?" and that we focus on that instead of on clickbait.
Chase meaning, not clicks.
So, it's back to writing for me.
How about you? What are you going to return your attention to and work towards that matters more than this?
