Day Right Quote #25: What We Accept, We Teach

I had an opportunity to share this insight "What we accept, we teach" in a "Never Be Bullied Again" webinar I gave for CAI - #Community #Associations #Institute yesterday that had 400 participants from around the country. I was talking about bullies and how we've been taught to "turn the other cheek" and tip toe around them so we "don't make things worse."

THAT makes things worse because SILENCE SANCTIONS.

Are you dealing with someone who takes the light out of your eyes? Someone who persistently steals your spirit or tries to make you feel bad, wrong or small? Someone who is doing their best to BLOCK your SerenDestiny because it's a threat to them?

Take this quiz to see if you're dealing with a 5%er - a bully who wants to CONTROL (not to cooperate) - who wants TO win (not a win-win) -- who wants you in THEIR power.

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/you-being-bullied-work-home-sam-horn

Day Right Quote #24: Have You ARRIVED?

A rather ambitious friend told me she'd always perceived true success as "out there somewhere," just beyond her grasp, not yet attained. She always has goals she's working towards which gives her life a sense of progress, but not much satisfaction.

We looked at our lives and realized, "We're both published authors, we both speak internationally, we're thrilled with the coaching clients we get to work with.

Plus, we're in good health, we have freedom to do creative work that matters, we're having fun and we're connected with loving friends and family.

Success isn't "out there." It's right here, right now. We're wealthy in what matters. We've ARRIVED!

How about you? Do you feel you've ARRIVED?

Day Right Quote #23: When You're Different, You Can Last

Comedian Don Rickles said, "When you're different, you can last." Rickles is right. The world does't need more copycats.

How are you different from everyone in your organization or profession? How are you one-of-a-kind or first-of-your-kind?

I was just working with a client on his TEDx talk, and we took out everything that seemed obvious or that sounded like someone else said it.

I told him, "It's not enough to be TRUE. The question is, 'Is it NEW?' Does it cause people to say, "I never thought of it that way." Does it open their eyes?

THAT's when you cause a SHIFT. That's when you add enduring value.

How is what you're saying and doing different than the norm? THAT is when you stand out - for all the right reasons - and get heard, noticed and valued.

Day Right Quote #22: The Moment You Put a Date on the Calendar is the Moment Your IDEA Becomes REALITY

I'm hosting a salon in NYC next week and a friend asked how she should prepare. She asked if she should just talk about her advocacy for woman business authors or what. I said, "No, put a date on the calendar and tell us WHEN you plan to host a Tele-Summit or live event.

If you get this bandwagon out of the garage, people will jump on it.

The moment you put a date on the calendar is the moment your IDEA becomes REALITY.

Day Right Quote #21: Are You Waiting For the Other Shoe To Drop?

Are you happy? In love? Career and business thriving? Despite all that, do you still find yourself worrying it's only a matter of time before something goes wrong? Do you keep waiting for the other shoe to drop?

RE-FRAME that RIGHT now!

I have a friend who had fallen into this trap. Everything was going well in his life yet he found himself thinking, "This can't last. It's too good to be true."

I told him, "From now on, your mantra is, 'Things just keep getting better and better.'"

That's how we wrap up our phone calls to each other. Instead of saying, "Good bye," I say, "Receive, receive, receive," and he says, "Things just keep getting better and better and better."

If you find yourself sabotaging your success by telling yourself it can't last, do a pattern interrupt.

REPLACE that negative self-fulfilling prophecy with this more positive, proactive self-fulfilling prophecy "Things just keep getting better and better and better."

We get what we think about. Focus on what you WANT - not what you DON'T want.

Day Right Quote #20: The Future Started Yesterday and We're Already Late

"The future started yesterday, and we're already late." - John Legend This is one of the most important lessons-learned from my travels the past couple of years.

So many people talk wistfully of what they're going to do ... someday. They feel they have too many responsibilities to do what they want now, but plan to do that when they have more time, money, freedom, health .. (fill in the blank.)

What if that never happens?

The clock is ticking. Not in a morbid way. In a motivating way.

Have you become a chronic procrastinator? Are you automatically telling yourself, "I'll do more of what I really want when I retire, when things aren't so busy at work, when the kids go off to college, when I have ....(what?)

Waiting to do more of what puts the light on in your eyes a path to regrets.

You don't have to completely overhaul your life or walk away from your responsibilities. Just pick ONE thing that's important to you and start doing it once a week - or saving for it so you can do it this year and you have something to look forward to. Make today the "later" you've been waiting for.

Day Right Quote #19: I am Not LOST in Thought: I am FOUND in Thought

I understand the phrase "lost in thought," but it's more accurate to say I am "FOUND in thought." Some of the most deeply satisfying, connected, creatively productive moments of my life are when I'm thinking, musing, observing, appreciating and writing.

How about you?

Day Right Quote #18: It Always Seems Impossible Until It's Done

How does a 735,000 pound #747 get in the air? As Nelson Mandela said, "It seems impossible until it is done."

When Mandela was in prison for 27 years, 18 years of which was on Robben Island where he was confined to a small cell, slept on the floor, forced to do hard labor in a quarry, and allowed one visitor a year for 30 minutes ...it must have seemed possible that someday he would be a free man again.

Yet it happened. He received the Nobel Peace Prize and was able to share his inspiring message of hope and perseverance with millions of people worldwide.

What in your life seems impossible right now?

See it as DONE. Imagine it as DONE. Picturing this as DONE not only keeps hope alive; it is one of the single best things you can do to turn that hope and dream into reality.

Day Right Quote #17: Our Lives Are Defined by Opportunities; Even The Ones We Miss.

I remember when screenwriter Eric Roth spoke at Maui Writers Conference. He was as eloquent then (he'd written the #screenplay for Snow Falling on Cedars) as he is now with this line he wrote for The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, "Our lives are defined by opportunities; even the ones we miss."

Have you been presented with an opportunity?

Are you on the fence? Don't play it safe. Take the bolder of the options.

We are here to embrace opportunities, not to miss them.

Day Right Quote #16: It Is Never Too Late to Be What You Might Have Been

George Eliot said, "Its never too late to be what you might have been" 150 years ago ... and it's as true today as when she first said it. When you were young, who did you want to be?

What did you want to do?

Where did you want to go?

It's only too late if you don't start now.

Day Right Quote #15: The Phrase "I DON'T KNOW" Is Small, But Flies on Mighty Wings

This quote from Nobel Prize winner Wislawa Symborska,"The little phrase 'I DON'T KNOW' is small, but flies on mighty wings" is from Maria Popova's excellent online newsletter Brain Pickings. Brain Pickings has been called a "literary LEGO treasure chest" of thought-provoking insights on how to lead a meaningful life.

Last week's issue was about the importance of NOT KNOWING and how embracing uncertainty is one of the secrets to an intriguing #life.

Every week Maria shares "rising tide raising all humans" essays and profound quotes that help us live a right life. Well worth reading and subscribing.

Day Right Quote #14: Old Ways Won't Open New Doors

Are you happy with your current life? Satisfied with your relationships, health, finances and career? Congrats! If there are things that are not yet the way you want them to be, the answer is simple.

Do things differently. Old ways won't open new doors.

Select one area of your life you want to improve.

What is one thing you can start doing or stop doing today that is different than your norm?

How will you change things up by NOT doing things the way you always have?

Dulce Ruby said, "Just like the moon; we go through different phases."

What a new phase? Try some new ways.

Day Right Quote #13: When I Die, I Want to Come Back as ME

A reporter asked Shark Tank investor and Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban, "When you die, who do you want to come back as?" Guess what he said?

"ME!"

Who would you want to come back as ... and why?

Day Right Quote #12: There Is More to Life Than Increasing Its Speed

Gandhi was right. There IS more to life than increasing its speed. Many of us are working, working, working, rushing, rushing, rushing.

We're heading into a spring weekend.

Instead of going for a run, workout or power walk to get your heart rate UP, could you go for a stroll instead?

The trees are budding.The flowers are blossoming. Breathe it all in.

Appreciation for the miracles that surround us is available anytime we want ... for a moment's NOTICE.

Day Right Quote #11: Love. Pass It On.

Love is the question and the answer. At the end of our #life, what we will remember, what will remain, what will matter is:

"Did we love? Were we loved?"

Day Right Quote #10: The Way To Get Started is to Stop Talking and Start Doing

You know what I've found? Another way to get started is to stop THINKING and start DOING.

It's easy to over-think things. We go back and forth, "Should I do this or this? Is this better or that?"

In the long run this indecisiveness - this quest to have all our ducks in a row before we go - just delays action and doesn't necessarily guarantee better results.

It's SMARTER to be a STARTER and and course correct along the way.

What is ONE thing on your mind you've been wanting to do? Don't just want it. Start it.

Day Right Quote #9: Life is a Window of Opportunity

Life is a window of opportunity. Have you ever thought of it that way?

We are here for a certain amount of time.

Are you taking advantage of your precious window of opportunity to pursue your dreams, connect with loved ones, do what makes you happy?

Henry Miller said, "Life is, for most of us, one long postponement."

What is something you're postponing?

How will you start that, do that, bring more of that into your life THIS WEEK instead of putting it off?

Day Right Quote #8: Abundance Comes in Many Forms

Abundance is about so much more than money. Anything that enriches us contributes to our abundance.

That includes new and enduring friendships, enjoyable discoveries, being active outdoors, achieving important goals, connecting with loved ones, learning new skills, contributing to our community.

Anytime we do something that puts the light on in our eyes, we are richer for it.

Anything we do that contributes to our physical and mental well-being results in us being wealthy in what really matters.

How about you? Are you wealthy in what really matters? Are you appreciating the abundance in your life in all its forms?

Lesson #10. It Wasn't a Mid-Life Crisis; It was Mid-Life Clarity

When I announced my plans to embark upon my Year by the Water adventure, most people were happy for me and said something along the lines of, “Take me with you!” A few, however, expressed “concerns. A meeting planner cautioned me with, “Sam, I hope you know you’re taking a risk by taking yourself off the grid. You need to control this story or the business you’ve worked so hard to build may not be here when you come back. You know, you can’t put the genie back in the bottle.”

A highly successful investor told me, "I'm envious, but I could never just do nothing. I'd go crazy if I didn't work."

Another wanted to know, “Is something wrong?” In other words, “Are you sick, on your deathbed or just having a mid-life crisis?”

I listened to their concerns, and then assured them my decision to take my business on a road trip wasn’t a mid-life CRISIS, it was mid-life CLARITY. I was clear that:

I wasn’t QUITTING work – I was doing a different KIND of work.

I wasn’t doing NOTHING – I was doing SOMETHING that put the light on in my eyes just thinking about it.

There wasn’t anything WRONG with my life – I was taking steps to create a more RIGHT life.

And I certainly wasn’t going to hide this from my business community, I was going to invite them to come along so they could vicariously experience the adventures and insights with me.

What helped me get this mid-life clarity?

Well, a lot of things. One was something my son Andrew told me. Another was a health scare and the doctor warning me I better take better care of myself or my body would do something more drastic to get my attention.

Another was a variety of quotes that served as wake-up calls and motivated me to “get a move on.”

They included Paulo Coelho’s sober reminder, “One day you’re going to wake up and there won’t be any time left to do the things you’ve always wanted to do.”

Another was my clarity of how fortunate I am to be in a position to answer what called me.

I’m not one of the 65 million people (29% of the U.S. population) taking care of a chronically ill, disabled or aged friend or family member. I can operate my business from anywhere. And while I’m not independently wealthy, I’m wealthy in what matters. I have the health, freedom and autonomy to disrupt my life and do things differently.

There was nothing holding me back … so I took eighteen months to swim with dolphins, watch the sun rise over Diamond Head, take a photography workshop in Monet’s Garden, sail the Chesapeake Bay, drive the back-roads of America (and almost over a cliff on California’s Pacific Coast Highway) ... write about my experiences and epiphanies.

I will always be grateful for that adventure. It was one of the most deeply satisfying experiences of my life.

What I didn't anticipate was My Year by the Water ended up NOT being about the water.

Yes, I visited some of nature's wonders - oceans, waterfalls, mountain streams - but what made this experience so memorable and pivotal wasn't the places I visited; it was the disruptive epiphanies that challenged everything I thought I knew about what it takes to lead a meaningful life.

Aristotle said, “An unexamined life is not worth living."

Well, after going 24/7 for the past few decades, this trip gave me the time and space to reflect on my life.

What I discovered, much to my surprise, was that many of my life-long beliefs and behaviors like “It’s better to give than receive” and “Winners never quit and quitters never win” "Hard work is the secret to success" – were not contributing to a quality life; they were compromising it.

As a result of having time to examine what was working, what wasn’t and what I was going to do differently; my life has been enriched in ways that are better than I could have imagined.

I know you’re busy and may not have the incentive or resources to take a road trip.The good news? You don’t have to quit your job, win the lottery, get a divorce or walk away from your obligations to embark upon a "virtual" road trip. In my upcoming book Chase Meaning Not Clicks, you can vicariously experience those put-you-in-the-scene adventures in short chapters, all which can be read in under 10 minutes.

What's even better, ou don't have to wait for the book to come out in early 2018 to benefit from those insights. Here are my top ten lessons-learned. Hope they give you the CLARITY, incentive and inspiration to do more of what puts the light on in your eyes starting today ... not someday.

1. A Life We Love Is Often One Small Change Away

2. We’re Not Torn Between Two Worlds – We Have the Best of Both Worlds

3. Why Do We Keep Driving Into Hurricanes?

4. If We’re Lonely, We’re Not Paying Attention

5. Courage Is Trusting We Can Figure Things Out Along the Way

6. It’s Not Selfish To Put Yourself in Your Own Story

7. There Is No Present Like The Time To Do More of What Puts The Light On In Your Eyes

8. Figure Out What You Want to Do NEXT and Start Doing It NOW

9. Fun Is Not a Four-Letter Word

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One of the great joys of my life is having the opportunity to share my adventures/insights at conferences. If you're planning a program and would like a presentation that gives your participants an opportunity to connect, reflect, and identify what they can do to stop waiting and start creating a life where the light is on in their eyes, contact Cheri@IntrigueAgency.com. It'd be a pleasure and a privilege to share these inspiring stories with your group so they're creating the quality of life and work they want now, not someday.

Day Right Quote #7: The Life You've Led Doesn't Need to Be the Only Life You Have

Looking ahead, where do you want to go? What would you like to do?

Who would you like to meet?

Get clear about ONE thing that could make your life more satisfying, meaningful or joyful.

Then, do ONE thing this week to set that in motion. Pick up the phone. Register for that course. Sign up for that sports league. Plant that garden. Reach out to that person.

As Anna Quindlen says, "The life you've led doesn't need to be the only life you have."

A better life is often only one small change away. Do something differently today.