Day Right Quote #58: Quit Watering Dead Flowers

What a joy visiting Hawaii's famous Talk Story Bookstore, meeting owners Ed and Cynthia Justus and hearing their surprising secrets to building a successful life and business in an out-of-the-way location. Here are a few take-aways from my interview with them. The #1 Prerequisite for a Profitable Retail Business is NOT Location, Location, Location - It’s Clarity, Clarity, Clarity

Their bookstore is on the least-visited major island and in a town of less than 3000 people. Yet they have been one of Hawaii’s Top 50 Fastest-Growing businesses for the past five years. TripAdvisor says they’re THE #1 visitor destination on Kauai.

How can this be? In one word …CLARITY. Clarity is the new location. Clarity about who they are. What they want. What they don’t want. And they stay true to those priorities. Which means gently and firmly enforcing their rules.

For example, you’ve heard “There’s no crying in baseball?” Well, there are no thongs in bookstores. At least not in THEIR bookstore. The twenty-something who walked in wearing her version of an itsy-bitsy, teeny-weenie yellow polka-dot bikini was asked to honor their posted sign, “No shoes, no shirt, no shorts, no service.”

The woman who told them she was going to leave her kids in the store while she went shopping across the street? Nope. “This is a bookstore, not a babysitting service.”

PAVE THE PATHS

Ed and Cynthia didn’t have a background in the book biz and didn’t plan on buying a bookstore. They visited Kauai on their honeymoon and liked it so much, they decided to take a leap of faith and stay. How did they make money from the first day they put their sign up, when they had no experience in the industry?

Ed says, “Amazon’s website taught us everything we needed to know about book-selling. Instead of us trying to figure out which books to stock and what to charge, we simply followed the favorites. Why re-create the wheel? Their site told us the most popular books in each genre and the going price for gently-used books.”

I said, “That’s brilliant. There’s an urban legend called ‘Pave the Paths’ which recommends that instead of prematurely installing sidewalks at public places (e.g., colleges and county buildings), it's smarter to wait and find out where people naturally walk and then put the sidewalks there.

That’s what you did. Instead of stocking what you hoped might sell, you 'booked the beloveds' and bought proven ever-greens that have a track record of always being in demand."

Don’t follow The Rules; Follow Your Values

For example, the “rules” say a brick and mortar store has to have a cash register, right? The problem is, cash registers lock you into one location, often in a front corner of your store. What if you have a customer in back who can’t find what they want? If there’s no one around to answer their question, they often leave and don't come back.

Ed and Cyndi don’t have a cash register; they have cash belts. Wearing a cash belt around their waist gives them freedom to wander the store and connect with their customers. While I was there, they greeted every single person who walked in the store. One was always out on the floor, asking people if they were looking for something in particular and then pointing out recommended authors in their preferred genre.

The trend of many bookstores is to offer coffee to attract customers. Well, they tried that and you know what they learned? Coffee sells coffee. Books sell books.

Another “rule” of retail businesses is you need to diversity if you want to grow. So, they added an art gallery with works from local artists. A restaurant. Book clubs. Internet service. Chairs so people could sit.

Guess what they discovered? Those extra services took lots of extra time and effort, created a lot of problems they didn't want or need ... and didn’t boost profits. In fact, Cyndi said, “We found that for every chair we took away, we added an extra $1000 of income. People who sit and read books for free for hours often walk out without buying any books."

The rules say a retail business needs an inventory system. Ed said, “Why? We mostly stock one copy of each book. Why spend a lot of time logging in and tracking single sales? Plus, we handle every purchase so we know what’s selling and what’s not.”

The Secret to Loving Your Life and Work? Stop Watering Dead Plants

As we talked, it was clear to me that one of the reasons they’ve been so successful is they QUIT doing things that didn’t work; that didn’t make money; and that didn’t bring them joy. This frees up time and money for business activities that contribute to their quality of life instead of compromise it.

They quit the belief that bigger is better. They've built and sustained a successful business because they've honored their belief, "If we don't love it; we don't do it. If it doesn't add personal and professional value, we drop it."

Chip Away Everything That is NOT David

I told them, “There’s a (perhaps apocryphal) story about Michelangelo who said, when asked how he creating his masterpiece sculpture, ‘It’s easy. I just chipped away everything that wasn’t David.’"

I smiled and said, "You have ‘David’d your business and life. You have chipped away everything that isn’t congruent with your values and vision. As a result, the light is on in your eyes and you’re successful for all the right reasons.”

So, what surprising lessons did I take away from my time with Ed and Cyndi?

* CLARIFY your values, vision, priorities and policies and STAY TRUE to them.

* Quit watering dead plants and DAVID your life and business.

* Gently and firmly ENFORCE RULES to protect what’s important to you.

When we do the above, we build a successful life, business and career where the light is on in our eyes - and things just keep getting better and better – for all the right reasons.

- - -

Sam Horn, Intrigue Expert, is on a mission to help people create quality projects that add value for all involved. Her work - including her TEDx talk - and books POP!, IDEApreneur, Tongue Fu! and Got Your Attention? have been featured in NY Times, Forbes, Fast Company and presented to NASA, National Geographic, Capital One, YPO. Want Sam to share her inspiring insights on how to create a successful life and career at your next convention? Contact Cheri@IntrigueAgency.com

Day Right Quote 57: You Can Love Your Job But It Won't Love You Back

A couple years ago this week I spoke for the Women in Consumer Technology conference in NYC and Cathie Black, former President of Hearst Magazines was the other keynoter. When asked her most important lesson-learned about work she said, "You can love your job but it won't love you back."

This came to mind because several people have said something to me recently about their job that caused me to think, "WHY do we do this to ourselves?"

One was flying from our afternoon meeting in one city to another city, had two presentations the next day, one at 8 am and she hadn't begun crafting her power point presentation which meant she was going to have to do it that night when she arrived on the East Coast after 10 pm or the next morning at 5 am.

One spoke about how "insanely busy" she was and that it was going to get worse before it got better because September was going to be a "brutal month."

The other had gotten sick six times in four months (she said, "How is that possible?!) and realized it was a wake-up call as to how toxic her work had become.

So, the question is, "Do you love your job?" At what cost?

Can you love your career AND maintain your quality of life?

How will you love your job AND make time for other priorities you love that love you back - like your friends, your family, your health and your __________ fill in the blank?

Day Right Quote #57: The Meaning of Life is to Find Your Gift, the Purpose of Life is to Give It Away

Such wisdom from Pablo Picasso, "The meaning of life is to find your gift, the purpose of life is to give it away." Have you found your gift? What is that? How are you giving it away?

A friend gave the commencement address at her alma mater. Some of the grads took the stage and with a flourish opened their gowns to reveal they were wearing t-shires underneath that said, "I DON'T KNOW."

Hah. The perfect answer for students who DON'T KNOW what they're going to do with their degree, career, life.

Many know they want to be happy. They just don't know how to do that.

The thing is, as Leo Rosten said, "The purpose of life isn't to be happy; it's to matter, to feel it has made some difference we have lived at all."

Please understand, I'm not saying it's not important to be happy. It is. It's just not WHY we're here.

We're here to make a difference - and one of the surest ways to do that is to identify our gifts and gift them back.

Are you not clear what your gifts are? Want a short-cut to finding out?

What puts the light on in your eyes? Is it singing, dancing, playing a musical instrument or sport?

Is it fixing something, growing something, building something?

Do you have a knack for words, for language, for stories?

What do people admire about you and say, "I wish I could do that" ... yet it comes "naturally, easily" to you?

What do you love to do? Look forward to with eagerness and anticipation?

What brings you joy? Makes you feel purposeful, that you're making a positive difference?

Those are all your GIFTS.

Now, figure out how you can TEACH THAT TO OTHERS or DO THAT FOR OTHERS.

Wrapping your career around your gifts is the surest way to expand your impact - for good.

Don't keep your gifts to yourself. That puts an unnecessary ceiling on their value.

Sharing your gifts is a way to set your SerenDestiny in motion.

Giving away your gifts is a way to scale your service and become wealthy in what matters.

Gifting your gifts creates a "rising tide" ripple effect where more people benefit from what you do well.

And isn't that what we all want?

P.S. If you'd like specific ways to do this, check out my book IDEApreneur.

I Didn't Change, I Just Woke Up

I was looking for an evocative quote on the topic of change for one of the chapters in my upcoming book SOMEDAY Is Not a Day in the Week. I found it in this, "I didn't change. I just woke up." (BTW, it's attributed to that ubiquitous philosopher - Anonymous.)

That's what I did on my Year by the Water. I woke up.

I woke up to the fact that:

* the clock is ticking. Not in a morbid way, in a motivating way.

* working, working, working is a prescription for regrets.

* change is not hard. A life we love is often one small change away.

* fun is not a four-letter word.

* we'll never be lonely - as long as we pay attention.

* connection is the North Star and Holy Grail of my life.

* I'd been living neck-up for years - and it was time to come to my senses.

* magic unfolds when we leave room for whims.

* it's time to stop ordering pasta we don't want.

* many of us are driving into hurricanes - because we said we would.

* courage is just trusting we can figure things out.

* Paulo Coelho is right, "One day we're going to wake up and there won't be any time left to do the things we've always wanted to do."

We'll never regret doing more of what puts the light on in our eyes - we'll only regret not doing it sooner.

30 Top Quotes on Curiosity, Creativity, Innovation: "Think Left, Think Right, Think Low, Think High. Oh, the Things You Can Think Up if Only You Try"

Eleanor Roosevelt said, "I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift would be curiosity."

I think one of the most useful gifts we can give anyone is curiosity. Curiosity means we care. It means we're attentive, connected, in love with ideas, life and potential.

If there's anything I've learned after twenty years of speaking, writing, and researching the topic of attention, concentration and focus .. it's that intrigued attention (aka curiosity) is the quickest way to create a life where the light is on in our eyes.

I've collected some of my favorite quotes about creativity and curiosity and share them here. Hope they spark your interest and remind you to look around and give the world and the people in it the appreciative attention and eyebrows-up interest they deserve.

1. “If there were a rehab for curiosity; I’d be in it.” – CBS news anchor Diane Sawyer

2. "Think left and think right, and think low and think high; Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try. " - Dr. Seuss

3. “Curiosity is free-wheeling intelligence." – Alistair Cooke

4. "Curiosity doesn’t kill the cat; it kills the competition.” – Sam Walton

5. “We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and trying new things, because we are curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.” – Walt Disney

6. “The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.” – Dorothy Parker

7. “The constant happiness is curiosity.” – Alice Munro

8. “Be curious, not judgmental.” –Walt Whitman

9. “I am neither clever nor especially gifted. I am only very, very curious.” – Albert Einstein

10. “Blessed are the curious, for they shall have adventures.” – Lovelle Drachman

11. “Curiosity will conquer fear more than bravery will." - James Stephenson

12. “I am in love with hope.’ – Mitch Albom (Hope is a form of curiosity.)

13. “Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known." - Carl Sagan

14. “There is moment in every child’s life where a door opens and lets the future in.” – author Graham Greene

15. "Before there were drawing boards, what did we go back to?” – comedian George Carlin

16. Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight or any experience that reveals the human spirit." - e. e. cummings

17. “I have found if you love life, life will love you back.” – composer Arthur Rubenstein (Loving life is a combination of creativity and curiosity.)

18. "Research is formalized curiosity. It is poking and prying with a purpose." - Zora Neale Hurston

19. “It is always with excitement that I wake up in the morning wondering what my intuition will toss up to me, like gifts from the sea. Intuition tells the thinking mind where to look next.” – Jonas Salk

20. “The world was shocked to learn I wrote a bestseller at 66. No matter how long you live, you have stories to tell. What else is there to do but head off on the Conestoga wagon of the soul?” – Pulitzer Prize winning author Frank McCourt, Angela’s Ashes

21.“When you can do a common thing in an uncommon way; you will command the attention of the world.” – inventor George Washington Carver (If it's common, it's not creative.)

22. “Creativity is based on the belief that there’s no particular virtue in doing things they way they’ve always been done.” – Rudolph Flesch

23. "Curiosity is the wick in the candle of learning." - William Ward

24. "The travel impulse is mental and physical curiosity. It's a passion. And I can't understand people who don't want to travel." - Paul Thoreaux

25. "You can't just give someone a creativity injection. You have to create an environment for curiosity and a way to encourage people and get the best out of them. Sir Ken Robinson

26. "Creativity is not just for artists. It's for business people looking for a new way to close a sale; it's for engineers trying to solve a problem; it's for parents who want their children to see the world in more than one way." - Twyla Tharp (I listened to Twyla Tharp's excellent book The Creative Habit while traveling across America. She says, "Every creative project needs a spine. What's yours?" Mine's intrigue and innovation.)

27, "Creativity is connecting things." - Steve Jobs

28. "It may be that our cosmic curiosity... is a genetically-encoded force that we illuminate when we look up and wonder." - Neil deGrasse Tyson

29. "Curiosity is at the core of creativity and intrigue is at the core of innovation." - Sam Horn

30. "Creativity is contagious. Pass it on." - Albert Einstein

YES to passing along creativity and curiosity. And feel free to pass along these quotes to anyone who might appreciate a curiosity-creativity boost.

- - -

Sam Horn, CEO of the Intrigue Agency, is on a mission to help people create quality presentations, books and brands that add value for all involved. Her TEDx talk and books - including POP!, Tongue Fu!, IDEApreneur and Washington Post bestseller Got Your Attention? - have been featured in New York Times, Forbes, INC, and presented to NASA, Accenture, ASAE, Intel and National Geographic. Want Sam to present at your next convention? Contact Cheri@IntrigueAggency.com

Day Right Quote 55: To Love and Be Loved is to Feel the Sun From Both Sides

David Viscott said, "To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides." So true.

One of the most important lessons-learned from my Year by the Water is that it is NOT always better to GIVE than RECEIVE.

It is better to give AND receive.

So many of us are so busy doing and giving to others, we don't allow them to give to us.

There is a grace in giving and a grace in receiving.

Connection is a two-way street.

Are you enjoying and being blessed by BOTH sides of the sun?

Day Right Quote #54: Stop Trying to Make Everyone Happy. You're Not Chocolate

I’m working on a chapter in my new book – Chase Meaning Not Clicks – about the futility of people-pleasing. One of the unexpected themes from my Year by the Water was how many people are taking themselves out of the game of life. They are neglecting their own needs and taking care of everyone BUT themselves. These are good people who are putting aside their own priorities because they have “responsibilities” to take care of.

I believe it’s important to be responsible; to think of others, to care for others.

I also believe that, taken to an extreme, trying to make everyone happy can become our Achilles Hell. (Not a typo). Self-sacrifice doesn’t serve anyone.

Please understand, I’m not suggesting we think only of ourselves and what we want. That is an equally unhealthy extreme.

But putting everyone else first - every time, all the time - is a prescription for regrets.

This insight “Stop trying to make everyone happy. You’re not chocolate” (or pasta, or pizza, take your pick) makes the point with humor.

Trying to make everyone happy makes no one happy. (This post shows an example of how I learned this.)

Are you a team leader, parent, project manager, caretaker, writer or creative? Are you trying to make everyone happy? As Dr. Phil says, "How's that working for you?"

Put yourself in the mix. You have value. You have your own voice, talents, contributions, experience, expertise, perspective and unique take on the world.

It is FAIR and NEEDED for you to honor and contribute your own abilities, insights and gifts. This is true on and off the job – at work, at home and in your community.

We serve best when we serve others AND our self. The goal is to keep things in balance, always in balance.

Day Right Quote #53: Don't You Know Yet? It is Your Light that Lights the World

When I present SerenDestiny programs, people often ask, "Isn't it selfish to do what you really want?" I tell them, "it is if you exclude everyone else's needs and priorities.

But many of us are doing the opposite of that.

We're honoring everyone else's needs and priorities and ignoring our own."

As Rumi said, "Don't you know yet? Is is YOUR light that lights the world.

This is probably one of the most important lessons-learned from my Year by the Water ... It is not selfish to put ourselves in our own story, it's smart.

It is not an indulgence to do what puts the light on in your eyes and fills you with joy - it is an example that inspires others to do the same.

In fact, here's how I learned that lesson.

Hope it inspires you to shine your light on and in the world.

Day Right Quote #52: There Is No Such Thing As an Ordinary Day

Dan Millman and his book "Path of the Peaceful Warrior" was one of our favorite author-speakers at the Maui Writers Conference. His insight, "There is no such thing as an ordinary day" is as true today as it was 15 years ago.

It reminds me of the powerful line from Thornton Wilder's play "Our Town."

Emily, the lead character, has passed but gets to return home one last time. She watches her mother wash the dishes in the kitchen and realizes she never appreciated the little things - a normal day - while she had the chance.

She asks poignantly, "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it?"

So often we don't. We get swept up in busyness, rushing here, there and everywhere.

However, we are here now. It is not too late.

Look around right now and imprint this day. Really see your surroundings as if for the first or last time.

Drink in the sheer miracle of being alive - of being able to breathe, feel, hear, taste, touch, love, experience.

A moment of grace and deeply felt gratitude is a moment's notice away.

Day Right Quote #51: The Future Starts Today, Not Tomorrow

Wisdom from the Pope, "The future starts today, not tomorrow." He's right.

We talk about what we're GOING to do tomorrow or next month when we're not so tired, busy or overwhelmed.

Meanwhile, our life whizzes by.

The truth is, we'll never have more time than we have right #now.

As John Legend says, "The future started yesterday and we're already late."

What will you do today to kick-start the future of your dreams?

Day Right Quote #50: Are You Putting Aside What You Want MOST for What You Want NOW?

Love this quote by Zig Ziglar, "Are you putting aside what you want MOST for what you want NOW?" The good news? Sometime there's a sublime convergence and what we want MOST and what we want NOW are the same thing.

Like today. I got some good news about my upcoming book - Chase Meaning, Not Clicks - so I wanted to celebrate.

Headed out to explore a new town and discovered a used bookstore, a fabulous library with a "Read to Rover" program in process, and THE best restaurant I've discovered in Boulder- the EMPIRE. What a perfect day.

Here's the question. What do you want MOST? What do you want NOW? Are they the same? Different?

Could you converge them for a morning, afternoon or weekend so you get to experience the sublime combination of a day where all is right with your world and you are SHINING with happiness and abundance?

Day Right Quote #48: When We Neglect What Matters Most to Us, That Becomes the Matter with Us

A few years ago - before I went on my Year by the Water - I was neglecting my health, some of my loved ones, and a calling to explore new territory (literally and figuratively) and write more. It feels wonderful to be back in alignment again, focusing on what matters most.

How about you?

Are you neglecting someone or something?

Reach out to the person today. Take time today to take care of that priority that's not been getting the time or attention it deserves.

The key to creating the quality of life you want is no secret. It's simply a matter of focusing on what matters.

Day Right Quote #47: The Wisdom of Life Consists in the Elimination of Non-Essentials

One of the keys to enjoying my Year by the Water was that I gave away 95% of what I owned. People ask if I miss any of it?

Nope. It freed me up to focus on what really matters and lead an even more #meaningful life.

Is clutter keeping you from concentrating on what counts?

Is stuff keeping you stuck?

Ask yourself what it costs in terms of time, money and energy to purchase, clean, repair and take care of everything in your home.

Is it adding value? Is it making you happier and healthier?

Or are all those "possessions" weighing you down, holding you back from the like you're meant to lead?

What would you be freed up to do if you eliminated some of those non-essentials?

Day Right Quote #46: Slow Down. You Move Too Fast.

Thanks Simon and Garfunkel for this eloquent reminder to SLOW DOWN and make the morning (This moment? This day? This weekend?) last. What's the big hurry? The faster we go, the more we miss.

Stop right now. Look around. Really SEE someone or something as if for the first or last time.

Take a big deep breath. Imprint this moment. Send up thanks for all that's right with your world.

Gratitude is a moment's notice away.

The contentment we seek is on the other side of slowing down.

Day Right Quote #45: It's Not Nature OR Nurture - It's Nature AND Nurture

My energy was a little flat yesterday and I wondered why. All of a sudden, it came to me. I had "inside-itus."

I had spent hours looking down at my laptop, working online, answering emails and writing a blog post.

Spending too much time indoors - and keeping our head down - is a prescription for feeling down.

So, I headed outside and LOOKED UP.

I didn't see this magnificent waterfall, but I DID see spacious blue skies, golden foothills and a serene lake park trilling with the sounds of songbirds.

Nature nourished me and lifted my spirits in minutes.

Are you overdue for some nature and nurture?

Thinks will be looking up as soon as YOU get outside and LOOK UP.

Day Right Quote #44: The Grass Is Green Enough

One of the most important epiphanies from my Year by the Water? “Sometimes, the grass is green enough.”

This may seem to fly in the face of being an adventurer, someone who revels in new places, people and experiences.

However, it’s not a contradiction.

NOW and NEW are opposite sides of the same coin.

There are times we’re eager to evolve and explore – and times we look around and think, “This is enough. I am enough.”

Sometimes the grass IS greener elsewhere – sometimes the grass is green enough right here, right now.

I took the picture below while exploring a new lake park near my home here in Boulder.

As I strolled through the lush grass, I laughed out loud as I realized. "I'm literally walking in clover."

It was a tangible reminder that being wealthy in what matters is not having or feeling one thing OR the other; it is a sublime blend of feeling and having BOTH.

Sometimes, we're walking in clover and loving every minute of it.

Sometimes we're seeking and appreciating new fields of clover.

They are not mutually exclusive; they are the yin-yang balance of a fulfilling life.

Day Right Quote #43: Being a Good Writer is 20% Hard Work and 80% Not Getting Distracted by the Internet

I laughed out loud at the irony of reading this quote online - "Being a good writer is 20% hard work and 80% not getting distracted by the Internet" - while I was supposed to be working on my book. Thanks for calling me out, Internet.

These days, the key to being a good ANYTHING is 20% paying attention to what really matters and working towards it - and 80% not getting distracted by the Internet.

That includes being a good parent, being a good boss, being a good entrepreneur, being a good person, and yes being a good artist.

It's important to ask ourselves, "Will this matter in the long run? What will?" and that we focus on that instead of on clickbait.

Chase meaning, not clicks.

So, it's back to writing for me.

How about you? What are you going to return your attention to and work towards that matters more than this?

Day Right Quote #42: My Happiness Depends On Me; So You're Off the Hook

This quote from Esther Hicks is one of THE most important lessons of my #life. When I told my adult sons I was embarking on My Year by the Water, they were thrilled. They told me, "We've got this. The best thing you can do for us is to be HAPPY."

In other words, "We can take care of ourselves. It's time to start taking care of YOU."

When are we going to understand that one of the greatest gifts we can give our loved ones is to be happy and healthy and have the light on in our eyes?

Albert Schweitzer said, "In influencing others, example is not the main thing. It is the ONLY thing."

It's not selfish to do what fills you with joy, you are setting an example for others that THIS is how life is supposed to look.

When we go first and lead a life we love, it gives others permission to do the same.

Day Right Quote #41: It Will Never Be Ready

Have you been working on a project for a long time - and it's not better, it's just different? Chances are you're second-guessing yourself ... and the critical voice kills the creative voice.

Or, chances are you're trying to get it perfect.

It will never be perfect. Our bestselling authors at the Maui Writers Conference didn't agree about much (one would say, "You HAVE to work with an outline" and the next would say, "I NEVER work with an outline.")

They did agree on two things. "Ink it when you think it" and they would STILL be working on their manuscripts if it weren't for their publisher's deadline.

Understand this. Your work will NEVER be ready.

But it's not doing anyone any good sitting on your computer.

Stop waiting until it's right. Stop trying to get it right. The right time is NOW.

There is no present like the time - and no time like the present - to get your work out of your head, into the world and into people's hands.

P.S. And if you'd like another way to get back into the "flow of thinks," click here.

Day Right Quote #40: Life Doesn't Come With a Manual, It Comes With a Mother

In honor of Mothers Day, what did your mother model for you? My mom - Ruth Reed - modeled unconditional love. She never criticized my brother Dave, sister Cheri or me. She believed in us from the beginning and was our biggest supporter.

She helped put the light on in our eyes at an early age by giving us the freedom to head out and ride horses. Instead of cautioning us about what could go wrong and worrying about us, she and my dad trusted we could handle whatever came up.

That belief in our ability to figure things out evolved into a confidence, independence and trust in the world that has led to a life of SerenDestiny filled with adventure, love, joy and fulfillment.

She's been gone now for thirty years - however her enduring influence is for life. Sending up heartfelt thanks, Mom.

What is - or did - your mom model for you? What is - or did - she teach you? How has she impacted you?