Waterfalls and Hot Springs

Science shows that delight – whether it’s laughing out loud or exclaiming at something that’s caught our favorable attention – releases feel-good endorphins. I am testimony to that. As written before, this ‪#‎YearbytheWater‬ adventure is half-plan, half-partner.

There are days and weeks when I need to be some place in particular at a certain time.

The last couple weeks, that would have been Washington DC for the White House United State of Women Summit and NYC to speak for Women in Consumer Technology.

Next month that includes being in Houston with my son Tom, his lovely in every way wife Patty, and my growing-by-the-minute grandson Mateo; then back to NYC for an event at the United Nations.

The rest of the time, I get to make it up as I go, parntering with what wants to happen, in search of delight.

Since I’m driving from the East Coast to Houston, I checked out route options. Hmm. I’ve heard about the The Omni Homestead Resort and its healing hot springs but I’ve never been there.

Sounds intriguing. Let’s go.

So, yesterday, I’m driving through the ‪#‎AlleghenyMountains‬, come around a corner and BOOM, there’s this waterfall.

I drive a little further, come around another corner and THERE is the Homestead, America’s first resort, home of the first indoor pool in the country, in all its glory.

I’ve lucked out. In addition to all its normal activities – horseback riding, golf, tennis, etc. – theyre celebrating their 250th (!) anniversary so there are FIREWORKS, set against the backdrop of the towering mountains.

But what catches my eye is AQUA YOGA … which is why you would have found me at the spa this morning. I tried to Herbal Coccoon and the Caribbean Storm "Experimental Shower." I'll take a drenched Ryan Gosling in "The Notebook," thank you very much.

Then it was time for our aqua youga class. Our teacher Teri welcomed us and explained that “yoga” is a Sanskrit word meaning “to unify” and that the focus of our session would be to unify our minds, bodies and spirits with nature.

Our first step (so to speak) was to do a walking meditation on the River Walk - or Reflexology Walk as it’s more accurately named.

Our small group of five moved slowly over the stones, feeling them with our feet as they woke up related parts of our body. Hello pancreas. Hello liver, kidney and heart.

The hydrotherapy we’re doing is based on the work of Father Sebastian Kneipp, an Austrian monk, who was one of the first to teach that the application of pressure on certain foot points relieves tension and improves circulation in corresponding glands and organs.

All I know is that this watery foot massage feels good, once you welcome the pressure instead of perceiving it as ouch, ouch, ouch.

Next, we slowly immersed ourselves in Octagon Spring, with its soothing, restorative, 96 degree water naturally infused with carbon dioxide and minerals of calcium, magnesium and potassium.

Teri led us though gentle yoga poses – half moon, warrior, side plank, boat, tree, Our movements flowed easily, thanks to the buoyancy of the water.

I marveled that I’m “land-locked,” nowhere near an ocean, yet my day has been filled with water in its many forms - waterfalls, hot springs ,cascading streams, river walks, aqua yoga.

Teri keeps us present by asking each of us how the water FEELS.

I tell her that whenever I’m in water, all’s right with my world. I appreciate how the water embraces me, supports me, buoys me. We welcome this temporary cessation of gravity and revel in our freedom and fluidity of movement. We all agree it’s an exquisitely sensual, sensory experience.

We end with Shavasana. Each of float effortlessly on the water, completely relaxed and at peace with ourselves and our surroundings. What a blessed way to start the day.

When we're in water, we are literally and figuratively in our element.

Why? Becaue we're made of water. We're not only connecting with nature; we're returning to our nature. We're coming home.

How about you?

It’s summer. Even if you’re land-locked, could you get yourself to a pool, lake, river or ocean sometime soon?

Could you gift yourself with a temporary escape from stress, tension and demands and get YOUR body in a body of water?

Could you unify your body, mind and spirit with the water, iimmerse yourself in it, move your limbs through it, float on it?

I'd love to hear your water stories. What it means to you and why.

Ripple Effects

One of the most important lessons-learned from my Year by the Water has been the ripple effect rewards of setting something new in motion.

For example, earlier this year, long-time friend Dewitt Jones (renowned National Geographic photographer) shared on Facebook that he’d be a guest expert at a private photography workshop at Monet’s Garden led by Charles Needle.

I immediately signed up even though:

• I’m “not a photographer”
• I don’t know a thing about f-stops, shutter speeds and ISO numbers.
• The other members of the group all had serious chops and years more experience
• I only had my trusty iPhone,not a professional-grade Nikon or Canon.

How could I pass up this one-of-a-kind opportunity to experience and write about one of the Seven Wonders of the Water World?

Imagine my surprise when, the very first day, Charles and Dewitt touted, and tutored us in, in the marvels of the iPhone.

Although they continue to use their “big boy” cameras - they’re big fans of the smart phone’s ability to capture a moment in the moment and the multitude of FREE apps that can “let the play begin.”

Within an hour of our first lesson, everyone was oohing and aahing with amazement at how an “ordinary” picture could become an “extraordinary” picture with a few trial-and-error taps of the finger.

We learned that anything can be art.

For example, I snapped a shot of my salad at lunch.  Granted, this is France so it wasn’t your everyday salad.  It featured delicate peels of pear and fresh lilac nestled in lettuce leaves that tasted as if they’d been plucked from a field that morning.

Thanks to SnapSeed,that snapshot turned into this lovely abstract image.

We wrapped up our week in Monet's Garden at “Golden Hour,” my favorite time of day as this was when the trades died down on Maui and my sons Andrew and Tom and I would head to Keawekapu Beach to play in the golden light before sunset.

That final night in Giverny, we strolled together down its charming main street to Hotel Baudy where Monet used to hang out and paint.

As we walked up, I saw Dewitt and his wife Lady Lynette sitting outside, contentedly sipping a Kir. Dewitt had hung his baseball hat on his knee instead of the table so he wouldn’t forget it.

I laughed out loud, snapped a shot and said, “Guess what the caption is for this photo?

KNEE CAP!”    Bada boom.

A couple minutes later, thanks to an easy-to-use app called SparkPost, I was able to produce this text image which will always bring back fond memories of that very special week and moment.

Over dinner, I suggested we do something my master-mind buddy Mary LoVerde (author of Stop Screaming at the Microwave) taught me.

As Mary explains, “Our annual summer vacation was a water-skiing trip to a lake eight hours away.  On the way there, we were full of anticipation so the drive went by quickly.

The trip home, not so much.  We were all tired, sun-burned and grumpy so, to prevent back-seat bickering, I invented the ‘Best Game.’  Best moment.  Best meal.  Best laugh.  Best new person met."

She continued, “This became our family tradition.  After every gathering – whether it was Thanksgiving, Christmas, a birthday or graduation - everyone got a chance to create a category and lead a round-table of answers. It’s a wonderfully bonding way to reflect upon, re-experience and celebrate our favorite moments.”

I agree with Mary that when people are gathered, it’s more fun for everyone to facilitate a meaningful shared conversation rather than swap small talk.

So, at our "last supper" in Giverny, I suggested we play Mary's “Best Game:

One by one, participants shared a stand-out memory – whether it was walking into Monet's Garden for the first time and having it take their breath away - or the fact that ten people could photograph the same lily pond and each would come up with a different point of view and perspective about what they saw.

When it was my turn, I said one of my epiphanies from our week together was what a delight it was to discover a new, instantly-rewarding skill at this stage of life.

Most skills have a long, often frustrating, learning ramp.

For example, If you want to learn to play the piano, it will take years of practice  before you get to the point where you can sit down and make beautiful music.

To play quality tennis, you need to hit thousands of forehands, backhands, serves and volleys before you can put them all together and enjoy satisfying games/rallies.

But with smart phone photography, you can have a good time and get decent results - with NO frustration or learning ramp - almost right away.

For me, that was a mini-miracle.  I am WAY over on the letf of the "techie" continuum. Things that come easily and naturally to others are “geek” to me.

But Charles, Dewitt and Jack H. Davis made this so easy to understand and do, it became a fully engaging creative process that produced gratifyingly satisfying results almost immediately – for FREE. Such a deal.

My roomie on this adventure was cherished friend Lynda Davis. Lynda was often up at all hours of the night … not because she couldn’t sleep but because she didn’t want to sleep.  She was having so much fun “binge-playing” with these apps; it was the equivalent of a kid begging for “just one more" before lights out.

So, what’s the moral of this story?

If you believe “You can’t teach old dogs new tricks,” please revisit that false assumption. It could be having negative ripple effects on the variety and quality of your life.

My friend Donna Steinhorn has George Bernard Shaw's quote on her email sig line:

"We don't stop playing because we get old; we get old because we stop playing."

Promise yourself that if a creative opportunity calls to you, you'll answer the call - even if you’ll be the rube of the group and worry you won’t be “good at it.”

If you see an activity that resonates with you – get yourself there – even if you’ve never done it before and aren't sure how it will play out.

If you’re traveling with a group or sitting around the table with friends and family, suggest the “Best Game” to create a connected, meaningful conversation where everyone shares and celebrates favorite moments.

Try something that’s out of your comfort zone and outside your competency zone,

The ripple effect of what you set in motion could enrich your day - and other people's day - for many days to come.

-     -    -     -

Sam Horn is the CEO of The Intrigue Agency which helps clients and audiences create quality, one-of-a-kind projects (TED talks, keynotes, books, brands, businesses and funding pitches) that scale their influence for good.

Sam's inspiring keynotes receive raves from such clients as National Geographic, Accenture, Intel, NASA and Capital One and her work - including her TEDx talk and books Tongue Fu! POP! and Washington Post bestseller Got Your Attention? - have been featured on NPR and in NY Times, Forbes, INC.

She's enjoying the best of all worlds in 2016, traveling the world on her Year by the Water, while speaking, consulting and writing about her experiences and epiphanies.

Get Out of Your Head and Come To Your Senses

I know it's a cliche; but have you ever seen anything so beautiful it took your breath away?

That's what happened this day last year when the historic floods cleared enough for our private photography workshop group - led by Charles Needle - to be let into Monet's Garden at 7 am sharp, before the public crowds.

I rounded a corner, and there was Monet's fabled lily pond and green arched bridge, framed by weeping willows and an abundance of living color. Palettes of pink , lilac, fuchsia, red and purple splashed across my vision ... and soul.

Dewitt (famed National Geographic photographer) and I agreed the gardens are a living, breathing testimony to Nature's abundance. What we experienced was the opposite of a perfectly manicured garden with neat rows, tightly clipped hedges and carefully controlled design.

We were surrounded by, as Dewitt put it ... a PROFUSION. I was intrigued with his just-right word and looked it up later. Profusion is defined as a "lavish display, extravagant."

That's exactly what was spread out before us and all around us. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "The earth laughs in flowers."  I found myself laughing out loud with sheer joy at what was around me.

I felt pulled along the garden paths, drinking it all in, filled with a timeless sense of wonder.  The trees were teeming with the coos, calls, chirps and twerps of birds greeting the new day.

Author Frederick Franck suggests we could counteract our busyness and non-stop rushing by creating an “island of silence” by letting our eyes fall on whatever happens to be in front of us – a flower or tree – and that we “look at it until it looks back at us.”

That’s what I’m drawn to do.  And as I gaze at the beauty surrounding me, I get out of my head and "come to my senses." Don’t you just love that phrase?

I’m reminded of ‘dah talk I had with Tom and Andrew when it was time for them to head to Virginia Tech (Go Hokies). You know the one I’m talking about. Where we try to distill everything we know into a couple pieces of advice on how to create a quality life that matters? I dug deep and asked myself, “What do I know for sure?  If I could only pass along a few life lessons, what would those be?” Here's what I told them:

Imprint.  I told them, "Charles Bukowski said, 'The days race by like wild horses over the hills.' The good news is, you can counteract the fleeting nature of time by imprinting special moments. When you experience something that moves you, look around and take a mental snapshot of what it looks like, smells like, sounds like, feels like.   Then, you can revisit it and re-experience it anytime you want.

My second piece of advice? “If anything ever goes wrong, get out in nature. If you’re worried about a test, if for any reason you’re feeling bad or sad – get outside and look up.  You will instantly feel better because it’s impossible to be in nature without getting a big picture perspective that centers you in what really matters.”

The third?  If you're ever at a crossroads, need to make a decision and can’t make up your mind, take the bolder of the options.

That’s what my dad suggested when I was trying to decide what to major in in college. Career counselors were advising me to study medicine or law so I could leverage my brain.

But I had grown up playing sports and planned to help pay my way through college by running recreation departments. That's what I wanted to study - Recreation Administration. Some people said that was a "joke" career, but I wanted to do work I loved that mattered and that's what Rec. Admin. represented to me.

So, instead of "conforming" to a more traditional or "practical" path, I chose the bolder option, the one that put the light on in my eyes, and things have just gotten better and better ever since.

I told my sons that Dad's advice to take the bolder option has led to a life I love. “When we make safe decisions, a small part of us dies. If you're not sure what to do, do what puts the light on in your eyes.”

Both Tom and Andrew have told me those pieces of advice have come in handy over the years.

And last year, in Monet's Garden, I got to do for myself what I had recommended to them.  I traveled to France as a result of a bold decision to take off for a Year by the Water, a creative venture that absolutely put the light on in my yes. I looked up and around and immersed myself in Mother Nature, and imprinted every blessed moment of it.

Meister Ekhart said, “If the only prayer we ever said was ‘Thank you,’ that would be enough.” As I steeped myself in the splendor of that special place, I sent up, “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

As I did, a duck swam into view. I laughed out loud as what popped into my head was … lucky duck.

I am indeed a lucky duck. And you will be too if you make a bold decision to take time off work this weekend and go somewhere beautiful that takes your breath away. It's summer. Do NOT be one of the 59% of Americans who do not take their full vacation days.

The clock is ticking. Not in a morbid way, in a motivating way.

Where is a place you've always wanted to visit - or a place that fills you with joy every time you go there? Get yourself there. And when you do, get out of your head and come to your senses. See, smell, hear and feel the sights and sounds. Look up and imprint. Send up your own "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

- - -

Sam Horn, Founder/CEO of the Intrigue Agency, is on a mission to help people create quality projects that add value for all involved. Her TEDx talk and books - POP!, Tongue Fu! and Washington Post bestseller Got Your Attention? - have been featured in NY Times, Forbes, INC and presented to NASA, Boeing, Intel, Cisco and YPO.

To See It is to Receive It

You've heard the saying, "To see it is to believe it." Well, being here in Claude Monet Gardens and Museum At Giverny, Franceas part of my YEAR BY THE WATER causes me to understand that:

"To see it is to receive it."

How could one look at Mother Nature's miracles and not be filled with wonder?

Years ago I wrote a book titled ‪#‎ConZentrate‬ that Stephen Covey recommended as "Fascinating, thought-provoking, motivating."

Although it sold well, was taught at NASA and featured on Dianne Rehm's NPR Show, my editor at St. Martin's Press, Jennifer Enderlin, told me it was "before its time."

Back then, many corporations or associations shied away from booking a program with Zen in the title. Too woo-woo.

Now, companies such as Goldman Sachs, General Mills and Google pay good money (smile) for courses on mindfulness and meditation. They understand the need and bottom-line payoff of their employees knowing how to stay focused and stay centered in our rush, rush, high-pressure, multi-tasking world.

There is a section in that book called "Now and Zen" with a chapter titled "Oh Say Do You See?" that features this quote from Henry Miller:

"The moment one gives close attention to anything, even a blade of grass, it becomes a mysterious, awesome, indescribably magnificent world in itself."

Miller's right.

However, to really see something takes time, and many of us don't take the time - or feel we have the time- to stop what we're doing and give this person, this place, this project our full focus.

In fact, many of us can probably relate to something my son Tom said during high school. The boys and I were discussing plans for the weekend over dinner. Tom looked a little distracted so I asked, "Tom, are you listening to me?"

"Sure, Mom," he said with a big smile. "You have my UNDEVOTED attention."

Out of the mouths of teens.

Because many of us are going, going, going from the moment we wake up to the moment we go to bed, it's easy for UNDEVOTED attention to become our default.

Yet the happiness we seek - the deep connectedness we yearn for, is available anytime we want - for a moment's notice.

My sons taught me the importance of putting myself on notice and of being here and how - instead of here, there and everywhere.

One night, while we still lived on Maui,I was giving Tom and Andrew their nightly back-rub after reading from their favorite book, Riptide.

We had created imaginative names for a menu of different types of back-rubs - bumper cars, finger rain, chop suey, slap happy. electricity.

But, that night, instead of being fully present and giving myself to what Thoreau called "the bloom of the present moment," I was a million miles away in my mind.

I was speaking on Oahu the next day and was preoccupied with, "What time is my plane again? When do I need to leave? Does the car need gas? Have I already packed my hand-outs?"

Then, for some blessed reason, my mind came out through my eyes and I saw Tom and Andrew as if for the first or last time.

And in that instant, an ordinary moment became an extraordinary moment. I was filled with gratitude for their health, for their being, for their joyful vitality ... for what Einstein called "knowledge curious."

I became re-awakened to how indescribably magnificent they were and how fortunate I was to be their mom.

How about you?

Do you have so much competing for your time and mind that you rarely really SEE anything?

Are you rushing through your days, feeling disconnected, giving UNDEVOTED attention to the people and places around you?

Anne Morrow Lindbergh said, "Perhaps we never really appreciate anything until it is challenged."

Could you promise yourself you will set aside five minutes today to stop what you're doing and give someone or something special your UNDIVIDED attention?

Could you put yourself on notice and really SEE this person, place or priority as if for the first or last time?

As soon as you do, you will feel deeply connected with them and viscerally grateful for them.

For those five "see and receive" moments, all will be right with your world.

Closed Door? Open Door?

Have you heard?

Paris is experiencing historic flooding, the worst in 34 years. Many institutions and visitor attractions (e.g., the Louvre) are closed.

That includes Monet's Garden in Giverny where I'm taking a private workshop with world-renowned photographers Charles Needle and Dewitt Jones.

I appreciate my fellow participants' response to the news. No pouts or complaints.

Everyone simply adjusted their mental lens and switched their focus to the many other metaphorical doors awaiting their attention and appreciation.

it reminded me of something that happened years ago when the boys were growing up on Maui.

We had planned a party following the final game of their soccer season. We rented the only public pool on the island, assigned food duties and ordered trophies.

(Yes, Tom and Andrew were part of the generation where every kid received a trophy. One time, I "rebelled" and ordered mugs with the team's picture, thinking the kids would enjoy having something they could use that would bring back fond memories of that season. Not a popular decision. Suffice it to say, we went back to trophies ... although we still use those mugs. Just saying:-)

The team won their final game so everyone headed to the pool in high spirits and with great expectations. We arrived with our floats, pool gear and water guns ... only to find the pool closed.

Bummer. We called the local park and recreation district. No answer. We rattled the padlocked gates. No luck. We walked around hoping to find another way in. Not happening.

The coach was fuming "I called them weeks ago to make this reservation. I've got the confirmation right here." The parents milled around, upset, aimless, unsure what to do.

The kids knew what to do. They grabbed a ball from the back of a van and seconds later, were laughing and having a great time playing an impromptu game of soccer on the concrete parking lot.

Hmmm. We parents looked at each other and realized we could still have our party right there in the parking lot. Out came the food, chairs and music, and moments later we were having a great time too.

Since then, every time a door (or pool) closes, I remember the lesson the kids' modeled for us that day and try to focus on Helen Keller's enduring insight:

"When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door we do not see the one which has opened for us."

How about you?

Have you had a door close recently on something you were counting on, something you were looking forward to?

Are you gazing at the closed door, upset, aimless, unsure what to do ... dwelling on how disappointing this is for you?

Could you instead adjust your mental lens and switch your focus to the open doors awaiting your attention and appreciation?

As Yousuf Karsh said, "The heart and mind are the true lens of the camera.

P.S.  Yes, I took these photos ... getting better at capturing images. It's easier when surrounded by the beauty of Giverny:-)

Why Do We Love Water?

I re-connected with a fellow TLC (Transformational Leadership Council) member recently and we had an intriguing conversation about why we're drawn to water. Rick lives on a houseboat in Sausalito, CA. He told me he “loves the flexibility of living on the water, because it’s fluid, always moving, forever changing.”

Agreed. I love water for a lot of reasons.

It’s not just that water feels like “home.” (After all, we are, all of us, bodies of water.)

It’s not just that water is beautiful, calming and inspiring … all at the same time.

It’s not just that water is a muse. (Much like some people drop into a hypnotic state gazing at fire, I lose myself in a writer’s reverie while gazing at and working by water.)

It’s not just that it’s the perfect forum for freedom of movement. (We can swim in water. Float on it. Sail, boat; paddle board, raft and surf on it. Dive in it. Walk and run around it. Splash, play and revel in it.)

For me, it’s the dynamism of water that makes my soul sing. The multi-faceted nature of it. The many yin-yang forms of it. The metaphorical epiphanies facilitated and fostered by it.

Just think of all the thought-provoking quotes associated with water.

1. “I feel most at home in the water. I disappear. That's where I belong.” – Michael Phelps (Me too. I feel at home by, in, on and around water. Although I don’t disappear. I come alive.)

2. “To have faith is to trust yourself to the water. When you swim you don't grab hold of the water, because if you do you will sink and drown. Instead you relax, and float.” – Alan Watts (Yes, I trust and am relaxing into this experience. When people ask how my Year by the Water is going, I tell them, “Swimmingly.”)

3. “The cure for anything is salt water: sweat, tears or the sea.” – Isak Dineson (It rarely happens, but if something goes wrong, all I have to do it get in water and it washes away the worries.)

4. “Being on a boat that's moving through the water, it's so clear. Everything falls into place in terms of what's important and what's not.” – James Taylor (Agreed. Water produces clarity and instant perspective.)

5. “The golden moments in the stream of life rush past us, and we see nothing but sand; the angels come to visit us, and we only know them when they are gone.” - George Eliot (One of the reasons I set out on my Year by the Water adventure is because I wanted to experience the angels and imprint the golden moments now, not some day in the far off future … or never.)

6. “Time is a river which carries me along, but I am the river.” – Jorge Louis Borges (Water and time are indeed Rorschach tests. How we view

them often reveals how we view ourselves.)

6. “Luck affects everything. Let your hook always be cast; in the stream where you least expect it there will be a fish.” – Ovid (I am reveling in open days. They are lucky hooks that catch unexpected streams of blessings.)

7. “I do not know what I may appear to the world, but to myself I seem to have been only like a boy playing on the seashore, and diverting myself in now and then finding a smoother pebble or a prettier shell than ordinary, whilst the great ocean of truth lay all undiscovered before me.” – Isaac Newton (People ask where I’m going to return to when my year’s up. I’m not going to return to anything. I’m not going back to who I was or where I lived. There’s an ocean of truths I’ve yet to explore. Onward. )

As I travel around the country and visits oceans, bays, waterways, streams, rivers and waterfalls … I am thrilled with their capacity to fill me with wonder, appreciation and awe.

Water has become a non-negotiable for me. I’ve lived around and by the water for the past 29 years (Hawaii for 17 years and then on Lake Audubon and Lake Thoreau in Virginia for 12 years)

When it’s time to find my next home (I’ve realized I don’t want to SETTLE DOWN. What a depressing phrase. Settle means compromise and down equals depressed), I want to be like the settlers.

The settlers headed west, exploring new country, scouting for a home that had just the right elements. Water. Good soil. Trees. Mountains. A way to do business or earn a living. When they found the right combination of elements, they didn’t settle down, they SETTLED IN.

At some point, I will be ready to SETTLE IN. Not yet.

When it’s time, like the settlers, my next home will be by water. For me, water is at the core of a right life

How about you?;

Do you love the water? Why?

What role does it play in your life?

How does it inspire you, center you, feed your soul, facilitate your creativity?

I look forward to hearing what water means to you and how you keep it in your life.

Has My Career Become an Aircraft Carrier?

 I had the pleasure of sharing my "What's Your Legacy Message?" workshop with ‪#‎CAM‬ - Conversation Among Masters - last week in Las Vegas.

This is a unique group of the world's top master coaches who have the tangible joy of doing work they love that matters.

The thing is, many have been doing this type of work for 20-30 years.

What can we do NEXT when we really like where we are?  How can we evolve and move forward in fresh, perhaps even more meaningful, ways instead of doing what we've always done?

Many participants came up after my workshop to tell me my "aircraft carrier" metaphor really resonated with them.

One said, "I never saw my career as an aircraft carrier. Now that I do, I see how easy it would be to just keep steaming along in the same direction unless I choose to do things differently."

I shared with the group that a Navy pilot who used to fly off aircraft carriers told me something about them I've never forgotten.

"Do you know how you STOP an aircraft carrier? You DON'T. You can turn off the engines, but it keeps going for miles because of its mass and momentum. Even if you put the engines in FULL REVERSE, it takes up to 4 miles to come to a complete halt. Just to TURN an aircraft carrier can take up to 10 miles."

I shared that one of the reasons I decided to take off on my YEAR BY THE WATER adventure is because I realized my life/work had become an aircraft carrier, A GOOD one, but still, an aircraft carrier.

I'd lived in the same area for 14 years. I've been speaking, writing and consulting for 25 years. I've engaged in the same hobbies/habits for 30 years.

There was nothing WRONG with my life. I was happy. I loved my family, friends, job, the people I get to work with, where I lived.

But if we agree with Jeff Bezos that it's a danger not to evolve ...

If we agree with Helen Keller that life is abundant and supposed to be an adventure, an experiment ...

And I do ...

Then it was time to jump off the carrier and do something different.

It's a big ocean out there and I was only seeing/experiencing part of it.

In our program, I shared many reasons people DON'T get off their aircraft carriers. Responsibilities. Obligations. People depending on them. Fear. Bills to pay. Perceived lack of money or education. The default of habits. The anchor of the status quo.

Some of us simply don't know what to do next and we're not about to abandon a "sure thing" for the uncertain.

We addressed those "barriers to exit," and I shared inspiring success stories of people who overcame their initial "failure to launch."

I shared that one barrier that's come up for me, and that seems to be an issue for many people, is that jumping off an aircraft carrier can come across as "selfish" when we have others relying on us.

Such is the case for George R.R. Martin. Yes, the author of the incredibly successful Game of Thrones series.

I read a startling excerpt from a Daily Mash interview where GRRM (as he's called in the biz) said,

“I was a hundred thousand words into Winds of Winter. I’ve got armies in one continent, zombies in another, dragons burning things all over the place and numerous uninteresting sub-plots involving minor noblemen whose names I cannot currently recall. It is, by anyone’s reckoning, a ... nightmare.

I was looking at several more months of inhumanly hard graft and even then everyone is bound to slag it off as ‘unsatisfying’.

Meanwhile it is a lovely day outside and I am an older man with more money than I can possibly ever spend.

You tell me why I should finish this? It’s an honest question. Someone else can do it if they like, I’m cool with that.”

WOW. George R. R. Martin is seriously considering JUMPING SHIP.

As you can imagine, his publisher, HBO and millions of fans are pressuring him not to. They want, need, expect him to continue producing the books they love.

The question is, "WHOSE LIFE IS IT ANYWAY?"

After dedicating decades of his life to creating a series that has delighted people around the world and made millions of dollars - for him and others - does he have the RIGHT to do what HE wants at this stage of his career and life?  To put his commitments aside and enjoy the lovely day outside?

Who is he beholden to? His fans and followers? Or himself?

How about you?

Has your life and career become an aircraft carrier? A successful aircraft carrier? Will you keep steaming along because lots of people are counting on you to keep doing what you're doing? At what cost?

Do you have the right to do what YOU want? Is that selfish? Whose life is it, anyway?

Even if your life and career are headed in good directions, are they the SAME directions they've been going in for decades?

Is it time to evolve, to explore other areas of the ocean you haven't yet seen?

There are options of course.

Maybe we don't have to jump off the carrier. Maybe we just fly off the carrier now and then to take side trips. Maybe we can turn the carrier in new directions, explore different parts of the ocean, stop in new ports.

What are your thoughts about this?

It's Not Selfish To Put Yourself in the Story

Yesterday was Mother's Day ... and I got the world's best Mother's Day present. Both my sons - and their lady loves Miki and Patty - told me they were proud of me.

Andrew said, "Mom, you're killing it. You've totally uprooted your life. You're eating healthier than you ever have. You're doing what you really want to do.   I'm proud of you."

Tom said, "You're in your sixties and you're finally putting yourself in the story."

Their feedback led to an epiphany.

You know what adult kids really want for their parents?  They want us to be healthy and happy.

And I am fortunate to be both.

I set out on my Year by the Water seven months ago for a lot of reasons - many of which I'm sharing on my SerenDestiny website.

At the time I didn't realize I was pursuing what author Paulo Coelho calls our "personal legend."

Have you read his classic book The Alchemist?  Many people have told me it was their favorite book, but for some reason I never read it.

Now I know why.  I was supposed to listen to it.

So it was that while driving from Florida to North Carolina last week,  I was swept up in Coelho's story of the shepherd Santiago as he journeys to the Pyramids in search of treasure.  Along the way, he encounters characters who embody the facets of the prism that unfold when we pursue our personal legend.

He meets a crystal shop owner who lives with regrets because he never summoned the courage to answer his calling, change his life and do what he really wanted to do..

It gave me pause.

Tom and Andrew talked about me being in my 60's.  I don't see myself as a boomer, although I am, and I never really think about my age.  (They always say we feel like we're in our thirties on the inside, and that's true for me. How about you?)

Many people call what I've done "brave."  They see it as risky or scary.

But I don't think about it as being brave, and I don't see my travels as risky or scary.

What is scary to me is the regrets I would have had if I had ignored the nudges that were calling me to set out on this adventure to explore our country's bodies of water and write about them.   The true risk would have been to miss out on the deeply rewarding treasures I've experienced in the past few months.

Are you a boomer?

Now is the time to do what you've always wanted to do.  You have eared the right.   You have spent most of your life serving and taking care of others.  It is fair for you to put yourself in your own story.  As the saying goes, if not now, when?

And in case you're wondering, I don't think it's selfish for us to do what we've always wanted to do - whether that's to go to rock and roll camp, move to Paris for a month, or take up paddle-boarding.

I'm still sussing out the part about this being "selfish," but Iv'e come to believe that the people around us want us to be happy and healthy.

They want us to take better care of ourselves.

They want us to do what puts the light on in our eyes.

They want to know it's possible to change our life - for the better - at any age.

When we do this for ourselves, we model to others that it's possible.  Our example may be just what they need to have the clarity and courage to do this for themselves.

I thought of titling this post  .... Boomer or Later.  But then I realized two things.

#1.  The message of this is actually ... Sooner, not later.

#2.  This message applies to adults of all ages, in their twenties and in their sixties.

Is something calling you?  Nudging you?  Set it in motion.

If you're a parent or grandparent, trust that what your loved ones want is for you to love them and for you to love your life.

If you're in the first half of your life, trust that taking a job that "pays the bills" but sucks the soul out of you is NOT what you're supposed to be doing with your time and talent. Get busy finding and aligning with people who love their life and are doing work that matters that puts the light on in their eyes and the eyes of others.

You will never regret answering what's calling you.

You will never regret honoring what's knocking on your heart.

You will only regret not doing it ... sooner.

What Are You Paying Attention To?

"Tell me to what you pay attention and I will tell you you you are." - Jose Ortega y Gasset Do you ever get discouraged by man's inhumanity to man?

It can be discouraging to watch the news and witness yet another tragedy, scandal or man-made disaster.

Yet complaining about it or being outraged by it hurts rather than helps ... unless we actively try to improve it.

Unfortunately, we can't always change or improve what's happening on the world stage. We feel powerless to make things better.

The good news is, there is a way to make things better. Paying attention to what's right in the world can improve the quality of life for us and everyone around us.

The challenge is, many of us have become so busy, stressed, angry or outraged, we no longer even notice man's HUMANITY to man.

This point was brilliantly made in an article by Gene Weingarten in the Washington Post years ago.  I remember reading this on a Sunday morning years ago when I lived in Reston, VA. I was so inspired by his thought-provoking essage, I set the magazine down and said out loud, "Just give the man the Pulitzer."

Weingarten wondered, “What would happen if you took a renowned violinist and positioned him inside a D.C Metro Stop during morning rush hour?

What if you asked him to play six compositions, each 'masterpieces that have endured for centuries,' and asked him to play these symphonies on a rare Stradivarius?

Would any of the hundreds of people streaming by take a moment to pay attention to a free concert by “one of the finest classical musicians in the world, playing some of the most elegant music ever written on one of the most valuable violins ever made?”

In the 45 minutes Joshua Bell played, (yes, the Joshua Bell who packs them in at concert halls around the globe), only seven (!) people paid any attention to his performance. The other 1070 people all rushed by, seemingly oblivious to the miracle in their midst.

Weingarten’s point?

There were several. One of which was to quote W.H. Davies who said, “‘What is this life if, full of care, we have no time to stop and stare.’

At what cost are we so uptight and driven, that we have lost the ability to see the beauty around us?”

Another intriguing insight from Weingarten, “There was no demographic pattern to distinguish the few people who stopped to watch Bell from the majority who hurried past.  

But every time a child walked past, s/he tried to stop and watch. And every single time, a parent scooted the kid away.”

Hmmm.  Makes you think, doesn’t it?

Kudos to Gene Weingarten for his visionary social experiment Pearls Before Breakfast.

Please take the time to read the article and ask yourself, “Would I have taken a moment to listen to Bell?  Why or why not?  Have I become inured to the beauty around me?"

Starting today, vow to focus on, and contribute to, what’s right with your world instead of what’s wrong.

Instead of dwelling on the news, which primarily reports man’s inhumanity to man, choose to give your attention to what’s uplifting, inspiring and enlightening.

Choose to notice and thank the people who are making a positive difference ... the parents, teachers, entrepreneurs, servers, community leaders who treat others with respect and are dedicated to living in integrity and adding value.

When you choose to honor and BE humanKIND - you expand it.

And when we expand humanKIND - we create a rising tide raising all humans.

Want another example of humanKIND?

Have you heard about Eric Whitacre? Have you ever had the chicken-skin experience of singing in a choir or hearing a concert of hundreds of voices lifted in song?

Well, Eric thought, "Wouldn't it be wonderful if I could gather people from around the world - online - and conduct a “virtual choir” with several thousand people from 58 countries … all singing the same song at the same time?"

Take a few moments to listen to the transcendent results of Eric Whitacre's Virtual Choir 2 "Water Night."  

Do it right now.  Really.  Don't "pass by" this offering of man's humanity to man.

I promise, for the moments you listen to this, you will be swept up in human harmony.

You will experience the joy that happens when people choose to come together in collaboration rather than conflict. 

You will be immersed in what's right with our world, right here, right now.

And by experiencing this example of human-KIND, you’ll see the world in a more positive and proactive light.

And every single time we do that, every time we pay attention to and contribute to the beauty in the world, we create a new narrative that elevates and celebrates what's right instead of what's wrong.

Don't Wait for Work You Love

"We don't FIND our calling - we create it." - Sam Horn, CEO of the INTRIGUE Agency and author of IDEApreneur People talk about finding their calling … as if it exists out there somewhere, intact, and all they have to do is look long enough and EUREKA, there it will be, hiding behind a tree.

I think our calling - doing work we love that matters - emerges from doing and pursuing things that matter to us.  It is a result of turning our passion into our profession and our joy into our job.

As former Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O'Conner said, "I've had a good life and it's because I stayed busy doing things that mattered to me."

Some people tell me they wish they could turn their joy into their job and do work they love. 

I tell them, "Stop waiting and start creating. They often push back with, "I agree with that in theory, but HOW do I do it in practice?"

I share the backstory of how I got into this career when I didn't even know it was a career. I am doing work I didn’t even know existed when I was in college. There was no major in this. No degree in it.  No newspaper ads featuring this as a job description.  There was no map, no instructions, no directions.

I just navigated my way to my ideal work/life by honoring The Four I’s – Instincts, Interests, Integrity, Lights on IN our Eyes – which are our Career Compass.

The work I'm doing is an accumulation of intuitive steps I took along the way.  When I didn’t know what to do, I checked in with my Four I’s and they  pointed me in the right direction.

Here's what I mean. When I speak for organizations, people often come up afterwards and say some version of this: “It looks like you really enjoy what you do. I wish I could do work I loved. How'd you get started in this?”

Here’s how I got started creating my ideal career  ... and how you can too.

Years ago, I was reading The Washington Post and noticed that the word “concentration” was used six times on the front page of the sports section.

Tennis player Chris Evert said her ability to concentrate and stay focused despite the planes flying overhead was why she’d been able to win the U.S. Open.

A golfer who missed a gimme putt on a sudden death playoff hole said he’d lost his concentration because of the clicking cameras of nearby photographers.

A baseball manager blamed his team’s 7-game losing streak on the fact that players were thinking ahead to the playoffs instead of concentrating on that day’s game.

I was intrigued. (I’ve since come to understand that when we’re intrigued, opportunity is knocking on our heart.)

I thought, “We all wish we could concentrate better but no one ever teaches us how. Concentration is key to just about everything – success in business, relationships, sports and life – but I’ve never seen any books on this topic. I’ve never heard any speakers on this subject. And it matters.”

This topic interested me. I felt it was an important personal and professional skill that would benefit people, so it was in alignment with my integrity. And myinstincts were telling me there was a commercial need for this and people would pay to learn how to do it better.

So, I decided to do a deep dive into the topic of concentration, focus and flow.   I  interviewed athletes, artists, executives, inventors, entrepreneurs and “everyday people” to glean their insights and examples.  Sample questions included:

1.  How did you learn to concentrate?

2. What do you do to stay focused even when you’re busy, distracted or tired?

3. How do you motivate yourself to focus when you don’t feel like it?

4. How do you regain your concentration if you lose it?

5. Do you have any special techniques you use to set up flow and to s-t-r-e-t-c-h your attention span?”

Based on my research; I developed a step-by-step approach on how to pay attention - no matter what - and offered it for Wash DC’s Open University.

At the end of the program, several people came up to ask if I would speak for their conference or company.

That one workshop launched a rewarding career that has taken me around the world and given me blessed opportunities to do work I love that matters with people I enjoy and respect. It even resulted in a book called ConZentrate that’s been featured on Diane Rehm’s popular NPR show, taught at NASA and endorsed by Stephen Covey and Dr. Ed Hallowell ( a leading expert on A.D.D.)

What’s this got to do with you? Would you like to do work that matters to you and to others?  Just ask yourself:

1. What do I find Intriguing?  What interests me? 2. What is something that calls to me  that I think is in Integrity because it would benefit people and add value for them? 3. What is a problem, need or opportunity that has caught my attention and myInstincts are telling me, ‘Somebody should DO something about that?” 4. What puts the light on In my eyes when I'm doing it?

Please understand …you’re as much a somebody as anybody.  Why don’t you do something about it?

Choosing to pursue opportunities that are alignment with your Four I’s can catalyze a life of SerenDestiny where the light is on in your eyes.

From now on, remember, work we love is not out there waiting.  It’s a result of us creating. Pay attention to what honors your Instincts, Interests and Integrity, and Lights on IN the eyes.  

Then,  get busy doing and pursuing what matters to you. What lights you up is your GIFT and gifting that back to the world by getting paid to teach it TO people or do it FOR people is one of the quickest paths to a meaningful career where you earn a good living doing work you love that matter.

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Sam Horn, Intrigue Expert, TEDx speaker, author of IDEApreneur, Tongue Fu! and Washington Post bestseller Got Your Attention? – feels fortunate to do work she loves, speaking for National Geographic, Boeing, Cisco, Capital One, writing books that add value, and helping consulting clients craft quality projects that scale their impact – for good. Want Sam to speak at your next conference? Email Cheri@IntrigueAgency.com for details.